Bayonetta - Xbox 360 review

Occasionally a game comes along that offers something new, something different, something original but not often does one come along that offers all these things as well as a mind blowing experience which travels down the brain stem and into areas southward. Bayonetta is this game, and it’s as baffling as it is beautiful. The heroine is Bayonetta, she’s a Witch whose theme tune is Fly Me to the Moon (maybe Witchcraft would have been more appropriate) and wears a skin tight bodysuit that would seem to prefer staying off her body. The cone shaped hair is a little weird, but her powerful persona, glasses, and propensity to flirt all blend together to make her as irresistible a temptress as Lara Croft, and in my opinion almost as iconic.

The plot in its simplest form, because it is a very complex and mind boggling plot, is Bayonetta’s quest to regain her memory after awaking in a coffin at the bottom of a lake unable to remember how she got there. Upon exiting the coffin she seemingly murders (to a young boy hiding in some bushes by the lake) a man who turns out to be the father of said boy, who turns out to be a journalist named Luka. Luka hunts down Bayonetta seeking vengeance for the death of his father but is no match for her and is constantly evaded. The game proper starts several years after Bayonetta exits the coffin, and she is searching for an artefact which she believes is of great importance to her past. We soon learn that Bayonetta is the centre of the conflict between the Umbran Witches and the Lumen Sages and as she regains her memory the details of that conflict become clear. Another game which borrows biblical ideas and Dante’s vision of hell, purgatory and paradise, in Bayonetta you will fight angels and demons, have the opportunity to visit hell at various times and occasionally paradise. The game is divided up into chapters and verses, and at the end of each segment you will receive a score based on your performance.

Gameplay wise this could take you weeks to learn the ins and outs and every combo, or if playing on the easiest level of difficulty it could become a bit of a button basher. There are so many combos, nearly every combination of Y and B will do something different, and ingeniously (this should be a feature included in all similar games in the future) you can practise combos in the loading screen which would otherwise offer wasted time. You see Bayonetta from a third person view and often from some provocative angles especially when the stylised camerawork takes effect in some of the spectacular finishing moves. The only weapons Bayonetta carries at the beginning are the guns on her arms and feet though she can use the various weaponry dropped by her foes throughout the game. New weapons, techniques and accessories are also available and can be brought at the Gates of Hell, as throughout the game you collect halos from dead enemies which act as currency. At certain times there will be a puzzle that will have to be solved in order to progress usually involving how to open a door or operate some gizmo. The puzzles won’t prove too much of a stumbling block and serve to make the gameplay more interesting. There will also be levels in the game where Bayonetta will be on top of or in control of a vehicle, for example one level features a fight on top of a moving lorry and then a motorbike chase across a rapidly collapsing bridge. Bosses form a large part of the game, and some of the bigger ones take up a level of their own. The battles are enjoyable though, and not so difficult they become boring, and aren’t so easy that you feel like you really didn’t have to try.

In the graphics department the game is unlike anything I’ve ever seen before, there may be biblical references but the design of the unearthly enemies is clearly influenced by Asian mythology. The locations are distinct, whether you are on the earth, in the heavens or in hell and all look equally good. The cut scenes are highly stylised and sometimes represented by still images, at others by grainy old-film style movie clips and will often occur at unexpected times during a level not just at the end of a chapter. The real star of the show though is Bayonetta, while she may not be classically ‘hot’ (not so keen on the hair, and that accent is a bit too prim and proper), there is undeniably something alluring about her that gets this dog hot under his collar. Often when executing attacks her clothes will decide to leave her body and reassemble themselves with her hair to form some devastating attack. This is as overtly sexual as it sounds, and it’s a fact that the most often used combo for a finishing move is called the ‘climax’.

The music in this game is also worth a mention. As I mentioned before Bayonetta’s theme is Fly Me to the Moon, in an updated version which sounds like a cross between Frank Sinatra and the Charlie’s Angels theme tune. The other scored music in the game is appropriately fitting and at times reminded me of the casino level on Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (not only the music, some of the gameplay features bring to mind Sonic as well, which only adds to the game’s charm).

Bayonetta is an amazing game, ‘nuff said. Maybe some of the gameplay, the music, is a little too feminine for some guys, and maybe Bayonetta’s too flirty for some girls, but there really is something for everyone in this game, and if you play through to the game’s conclusion Bayonetta will leave you feeling incredibly satisfied, ahem, the game that is. To quote Beyonce Bayonetta can be a “sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare”, and both those sides of the game are equally enjoyable. Here’s hoping they make a sequel so we can get in bed with Bayonetta again.